I’m a person who gives a lot of advices. Sometimes, they turn out to be crappy but at other times, they turn out pretty well. I do not believe in lying and making people happy. I’d rather give a truthful advice which might make the other person sad, than giving a completely fake advice to make others happy. I love making people happy but not with false stories.
Even though I give advices, don’t for one second think that I don’t get them enough. I get a lot of those from many people; my parents, my friends, random strangers on the subway and sometimes, the same people I give advices too. Sometimes, they make sense, but most of the times, these advices doesn’t make sense at all. I remember, once I attended this course on healthier living, where we had to make small groups and give advices to all the people in the group. I was shocked when one girl said, “You should stop being shy and start opening up.” Honestly, I felt offended. I am not the type of person who is an introvert and never participate in anything. When she said that, I couldn’t help, but wonder what is wrong with people nowadays?
There is a conception that giving advices is an easy thing. It is just saying some words about the other person and who does it better than people themselves? Trust me, it’s not easy. Giving bad advices can be cause really bad consequences and you end up feeling guilty of what you did. You might have meant good but usually it ends up nowhere good. I’ve given some awful advices, and even though they weren’t serious, life-changing situations, the consequences still haunt me sometimes. I think ten times before I open my mouth.
Another important thing, you’ve to know the other person really well. Knowing a person is important. If you give an advice to somebody you barely talk to, they might get offended or even worse, you end up giving a bad advice. Once a completely random stranger walked up to a friend of mine, who is a bit fat, and said, “You should look after you weight, child.” She was offended, not because he commented on her weight but because he didn’t know the truth; she had thyroid problems. So it’s important you first know that person and then give an advice.
As I said, I get a lot of advices too. Sometimes about my weight because I’m too skinny, about my lifestyle, or about my life. I try not to get offended. Even if a random stranger comes up to me and gives me a lame advice, I just smile and say thank you! It’s always good to listen, even though it’s up to you if you really want to use that advice.
But there is an advice which was given to me, when I was in tenth grade by a teacher. She said, “Don’t give up and chase your dreams. I see a lot of potential in you and if anybody tells anything otherwise, just ignore them and move on.” I don’t want to reveal the situation or circumstances under which she said these words, but this is an advice, which I haven’t given anybody till now and I don’t intend to give it to anybody anytime soon.
You might think, I’m being selfish and I don’t care about others. Trust me, that’s not the reason. If I didn’t care about others, I would have never given any advice. It’s really easy to get out of “giving advices.” In life, you meet people who change your life, for worse or better. The advices they give is worth remembering. If a person changes your life for good, then their advices should be the stepping stones to your dreams. And if the person changes your life for bad, then you should do exactly the opposite of what they advised you.
This teacher changed my life… for good. And this advice? Well, I would never give this advice to anybody else until I’m the person who changes someone’s life.
Making today’s daily prompt “Not for Thee.” personal!